While doing a last minute gig this past Friday, the father of the bride came to my area where I was set up and handed me two $100 bills. I looked at him completely puzzled and told him that the tip wasn't neccessary, and he cut me off mid-sentence and went on to give me praises. He said that he liked my selections of music, my set-up, and that there was no one else that could have done a better job for his daughter. Obvisously I was flattered, but just the same I didn't feel comfortable accepting a $200 tip. I felt compelled to keep doing the "good job he thought I was doing" for the remainder of the night.

My question to you guys is what do you think is an acceptable tip and is it even customary to accept whatever anyone offers? I mean if the guy had shot me $1-$20 I would have felt okay, but $200??? That totally threw me for a loop. I told my co-workers about it today and they told me that I should take a tip jar with me to gigs, but I told them that I thought that was tacky. It's almost like I expect to be tipped and that's the total opposite. I just enjoy making people have a good time. Please provide any insight. Thanks. - Danjah

Keep the attitude. Tips are a great thing, but don't ask for them or expect them. Go above and beyond and exceed the expectations of the crowd and client and how knows you might get lucky.

Tip Jars are never classy. People tip more when not asked then when asked. And always turn it down to be modest and humble. The best tip I ever got was $500.00 at a $1000.00 Wedding. I get jazzed on finding a $10.00, so any tip is always a thrill...

Hey, obviously you did a good job. It's important to acknowledge that even if you think it wasn't so hot, the people out there did - so accept the tip graciously and run to the bank laughing!

But keep the attitude you have otherwise - don't ask for or solicit tips in any way shape or form, but don't turn them down either.

-r-

well said steele.. You Canadians are always so polite yes even Pulse...

In keeping with the spirit of the replies,I'd say take it,after One Humble Refusal especially after working the gig,the way we all know you did. But as stated above,NEVER,EVER,bring the tip jar. Next they'll expect you clean their car windows with a squeegee.....

Nobody calls me twice for dinner, but cash tips I turn down once, second time they offer, I take.

Actually I had a Groom throw me a $100.00 once right after the introductions, with 5 hours left in the Reception. I was very polite about it, but did say " So you want a gauranteed good night " and then laughed. He agreed, laughed and at the end of the night gave me another $100.00

Man, I promise this is all news to me. I had no idea and never expected that anyone would tip the DJ. That has got to be the ultimate compliment to the person doing the gig. $500??? I can't even fathom that, let alone $1000 for a gig, but Arkansas' cost of living is a lot lower than California's so maybe it balances out. I do appreciate the advice. If I understand you guys correctly, a humble turn down is fine, but if they insist, graciously accept, keep it rockin' and never bring the empty mayonaise jar...got it! Thanks again guys. - Danjah

Keep in mind when you see numbers like that from jay or myself, we're from San Diego where it was just reported yesterday that the median price for a home is $585,000. We charge more just to make the mortgage and people here understand that. It all balances out wherever you're from.

I have a contrary opinion to the other guys. I'll humbly accept a tip and blush on cue, but I think turning one down is rude. I can't stand it when I have to convince someone to accept a tip from me. I usually put some pretty hard thought in to how much to tip. I don't want someone embarrassing me by making me feel my gesture is out of line. People are naturally uneasy about money matters and it probably took a lot of emotion and thought to decide to tip you that much, and you embarrass him by handing it back?

But I do agree tip jars are tacky! Someone is paying you exactly what you asked for to be there. If you wanted more, you should have asked for it. You might as well tell the person who is paying you "I'm not making enough to do a good job tonight so I'm going to pass the hat to all your guests." BTW- Sometimes if you're getting huge tips on a fairly regular basis, it's not only an indication of a job well done, but also that your rates may be too low.

In general when someone offers you a tip (or an unexpected payment) it's okay to refuse once or twice. Afterwards you can accept graciously. Mofo made a good point - people sometimes put thought into how much to tip. Also it's generally their way of showing appreciatiion.

It's a tip you didn't ask or expect it. He liked your service and felt that it was worth 200. When was the last time a waiter said oh no give me less of a tip? Value your work, or nobody will.

To be literal:

Option 1:

(tip presented)
You: Oh, I can't take that!
Tipper: No, you did a great job tonight!
You: Thank you so much (taking tip)

Option 2:
(tip presented)
You: Thank you so much... I'm glad you had a good time tonight (taking tip)

Myself, as both a presenter of tips and a receiver... when a tip is offered... the verbal exchange that takes place is a formality, like a gentlemans thing...

You nailed it man.

More like...

"Oh, that's not necessary."

As I snatch it out of his hand so quick he gets an indian burn on his palm.

The responses here are correct. The only thing I'll add, is that if the guy couldn't afford the tip, he wouldn't have presented it. Giving a $200 tip may not be a big deal to some people.

My point exactly, you didn't ask for it. He could have been a member of g-unit or something. This guy was not going to go hungry by giving you this tip.